4 Tips on Dealing with Negative Self Talk


Photo by Anh Nguyen on Unsplash


It happens to the best of us. I’m sure even Beyonce experiences negative self-talk from time to time. It’s almost impossible to stop that sneaky little voice from creeping up on us anytime we try to do something. It can come on at work, while out with friends, or even when you’re just alone watching television. Whenever you feel negative self-talk coming on you can do 1 of 2 things, you can engage with it or you can shut it down. However, sometimes we’ve let negative self-talk run our lives for so long that it’s hard to get a grip on it when it starts. Fortunately, these 4 tips will help you get a grip on that negative voice in your head.


1. Notice Your Thoughts

Negative self-talk often comes on as a random intrusive thought. “You suck” or “You’ll never be good at this” is common intrusive thoughts we all experience. The next time you have a negative thought notice it! You can say out loud or in your head, “hey I just had a negative thought about ___.” When you notice the thought right away you can shut it down rather than engaging with it.


2. Challenge Your Negative Thoughts

That voice in your head that tells you that you’ll never be able to write a book or finish your degree is wrong. What degree or book has that thought ever authored or finished? None! Another way to challenge the thought is to ask yourself, “what evidence do I have that makes this thought true?” Probably none. Most negative thoughts are baseless and only go on because you engage with them.


3. Practice Letting Go

It’s hard when you are having negative thoughts about your body, your lifestyle, or your life decisions. But know that you can let these thoughts go any time you want. You don’t have to hold on to them. When a negative thought pops up in your mind, you can let it go. Don’t invite it to stay for tea.


4. Practice Gratitude

Negative thoughts and negative self-talk make us forget all the good things we have going for us.Which is why keeping a gratitude journal is so important. Whenever those negative self-talks start to bubble up, turn to the gratitude journal to remind yourself how good you really have it. Eventually, gratitude will be your go-to thought rather than negative self-talk.


Negative self-talk impacts everyone and it can be hard to get a grip on it. If you’re struggling with negative self-talk call us to schedule an appointment. We can help you master the skills and tools you need to function without negative self-talk.